When I was a little girl, like most girls my age, I was a teeny bit obsessed with The Little Mermaid. And pretty much anything else mermaid oriented. Even though I never dressed up for Halloween when I was little, I remember my mom made me a mermaid tail out of turquoise muslin material. Only I guess I was growing quickly or she miscalculated and my feet ended up sticking out by about 6 inches out the bottom. But that was okay.

I had the soundtrack to The Little Mermaid on cassette tape and would play the tape in our basement for hours on end while I sang and danced to every song…even that weird “Fathoms Below” song the sailors sang at the beginning.

I think every girl in some way can relate to mermaids. They’re beautiful and mysterious. And especially with The Little Mermaid- she felt out of place and longed to be part of something bigger. I think that’s a feeling we can understand.

As I grew up I continued to love mermaids. I once photoshopped a picture of myself as a mermaid (picture left). I geeked out when I got to visit Weeki Wachee Springs in Florida when I was 5 years old, and then again in my twenties. I still wonder what it would be like to breathe underwater (top 5 coolest superpowers ever, am I right?) and swim with fish and dolphins like they were friends. To be fair to my husband, the house isn’t decorated with mermaids, but I’ve thought about buying things once or twice with mermaids on them. Especially now that I’m married to a sailor. How fated is that?

When I moved to Hawaii, I had the great pleasure of realizing one of my childhood fantasies: to meet a real live mermaid.

My friend Kariel (yes, that’s Ariel with a K- it’s really her name!) is a mermaid. She lives by the water and she has her very own beautiful tail. I couldn’t stop asking questions when I saw her tail airing out to dry one day on her lanai overlooking the water. I have been a little bit fascinated ever since.

I got the chance to sit down with Kariel and ask her some questions. The five year old me was squealing inside the whole time!

When did you first come up with the idea to create a tail and become a mermaid?
I decided to make a tail about 2 years ago when I moved.  Hawaii is the perfect place to swim with a tail. I had always wanted a mermaid tail since I was about 4, I watched The Little Mermaid in the theater as a girl. I’ve been pretty much obsessed since then. Then I saw Splash! That was a great movie too.
I remember when computers were just getting popular and I would look online, trying to find who made that tail (from Splash) and how to get one. It was around $5,000 as I remember. Which seemed like millions in the 80’s. But that’s the moment I knew it was possible to make a tail that could swim in the water.

Tell me about the tail.
When I first started looking up how to have one, I knew I could buy one online but I wasn’t ready to spend my savings to buy one, especially while I lived in a cold area. 
So when I got to Hawaii I started thinking about it and thought, Well, I’m creative. I could just make one and it would be less expensive, more special and I definitely would appreciate it more. Well, it wasn’t exactly less expensive. And it didn’t take two days to make like I thought. But it was worth it!

So how long did it take you to make the tail?
About 400 hours over about a 5 month period. I sewed it and handpainted all the scales and detail on the tail. I’m working on a pink and gold tail now that’s almost finished too. I started that about 2 months ago. By the time I am finished,  that one will probably have about 200 hours into it.

Where do you hope to go with all of this?
I’d love to travel with it and do shows. I would also really like to create my mermaid-inspired bikini line and for that to be successful. It would kind of be like allowing every girl to be a mermaid at heart. I’ve also written a children’s book. I’d like for most of the proceeds from the children’s book to go toward cancer research. In the end my final goal is to do something gigantic for mankind. Something that makes a great impact! I believe that is my purpose, so I'm using every talent I have, to start!

 Tell me about the children’s book.
I illustrated it with pastel colored pencils. It’s about mermaids, and it’s a self esteem book for kids. I actually got to test it in a classroom setting and they really grasped the moral of the story, which just made me so happy. They really understood what self esteem was and how they can affect someone else’s self esteem.

What made you want to write the children’s book?
My grandma was dying of  Leiomyosarcoma cancer (that cancer isn't even in my new computer's dictionary!), and I was in the waiting room and I always drew these pictures. I thought, you know, instead of just drawing random pictures, why not just create something? I needed something to show for it. I wanted to put everything together and really make something, a book. Some way to help. I felt kind of helpless throughout her experience. I wish I could have done something big to make a difference while she was still alive, to make things easier on her. I promised myself I would do it, finish, sell it and donate the proceeds to finding help and knowledge.

What would you tell little girls that want to grow up to become mermaids themselves?
I would tell them to go for it. Lots of kids email me from my website and from my Youtube channel, and they’ll say, I wish I could do it but my parents or somebody will laugh at me. It just goes back to self esteem- if you have a dream, I say go for it. Even my husband laughed at me for years. But then I had this idea and actually went through and created it. And he is really impressed now. So many people laughed about it and thought I was silly for spending all this time making this tail, but now that it’s finished people are amazed.

You must be a really great swimmer- have you had any scary moments swimming as a mermaid?
Whenever I go under water for pictures I don’t wear a mask. It’s always a little bit scary because I can’t really see. You don’t really know what’s out there. This one time I swam with another mermaid friend so both of us were blind swimming out there and we just saw this big grey thing go by. We were like, “Did you see that? Did you see that? Was it a shark?!” We never found out. That was a bit scary. Yes I am a good swimmer now, before I was only capable of doggy paddling believe it or not. but when you have a dream you must go for it and I wanted to be a mermaid!

You’ve swam with turtles, stingrays, and even dolphins so far.  What else do you still want to swim with?
I still really want to swim with dolphins some more. I’d love to get closer to them! I believe I have a friend- it's a Spotted Eagle Ray. He came and found me multiple occasions and we have swam side by side. That is the neatest experience I have had yet. I can't wait to go to that spot again and see if he joins me.  I think the sea creatures are curious about me.  Some fish even follow me and I swear I get looks as if they are saying, "Who are you?"

What’s coming next for you?
There are big things are happening soon. I’m really excited! The swimsuit line is coming together. And so much more! Either way, you’ll see me swimming around.

Kariel is currently living her dreams as a mermaid in Hawaii. She models with her tail under and above water for print ads and film. She performs in underwater shows in aquariums and lagoons. She also makes promotional and philanthropic appearances. 

Kariel is working to market and sell her children’s book with which a majority of proceeds will go toward funding research to cure cancer in memory of her grandmother. She is currently creating and developing a mermaid-inspired swimsuit line.

You can keep up to date on all of Kariel's mermaid happenings by “Liking” her on Facebook and following her on Twitter. You can also visit her website at www.MermaidKariel.com.

My little girl self is still squealing. :)

Got a new laptop! Well....Geeksquad gave up on mine and replaced it with a new one. I'm in the fun restoring process now and noticing all the things I really should have backed up. Bummer.

Anyway, once I get up and restored I am re hauling the website. Can't wait!

In the meanwhile there are a few things I need to mention:

• Bob Marley might be one of the best musicians alive. I realize I'm late in coming to this conclusion but I just finally got a cd today and am obsessed with it. I am convinced if we blasted Bob Marley music 24-7 across the world, we would all be much happier people. And the world might become a little greener....I mean environmentally of course. :)
• In addition to Bob Marley I came across this other AMAZING singer the other day (and was so angry I wasn't able to download anything right then because my laptop was being fixed and iTunes was charging double what Amazon was charging to download the album- ANYWAY...) Check out Donavon Frankenreiter. Also a mellow island kind of jam. If you like Jack Johnson, you will like Donavon. Plus, you have to appreciate him for his awesome name alone. Right?
• My last blog I got a comment from someone who found me through someone else who found me on Twitter (did that make sense?). Anyway, she is ALSO from Maryland, also a Navy wife, ALSO stationed here in Hawaii. How random is that? Makes you realize how small a world it really is. I got the chance to check out her blog and it's super cute. Check it out at www.aisletoaloha.blogspot.com (which currently has a really nice giveaway!) and follow her on Twitter at @AisleToAloha!

Alright. I have got a substantial amount of configuring to do with this computer. Hope everyone is doing great! Have a great night!

Day 101 of Deployment....

I have been absolutely awful at writing lately. I’d like to say because I’ve been spending EVERY waking minute at the beach but in actuality, I do work. Albeit a part time job, but still.

I’m three months into deployment. I spent the first month pretty involved with the other boat wives (and ate a LOT of pizza), the second month I completely withdrew and didn’t want to do anything. I feel like I’m definitely coming back up from that. There’s a chart of the emotions that statistically most women go through during a deployment.

I refused to read the article for fear the psychology major in me would try to replicate the emotions needlessly. Instead I’m doing my own thing and enjoying my own therapy: the beach. The beach has been comfort to me. Other than the beach, I have been working. Actually, my position with the non-profit I have been working as a temp with has gone so well that they are going to take me on as a permanent employee! Pretty exciting. And comes with a pretty decent raise. I really enjoy working there though I adore my boss and she is leaving so I’m not sure how that will change things. I just believe everything will work out the way it should.

My sister and niece came out to visit and stayed with me just over a week. I thought it was going to be a relaxing, laid- back trip (her words!) but we ended up getting up early every day (same time I get up for work and earlier some days- though for them it was like sleeping in with the time difference) and we did a TON of stuff. 

It was awesome though. We had such a crazy week that we (and by we I mean mostly her) took over 1100 pictures. And broke two waterproof cameras. Thank God for my iPhone because it became our only camera and actually took great pictures.

Some of the highlights of the week- Paradise Cove luau, and driving around the island from Waikiki to North Shore and back down through the middle of the island to ‘Ewa (the west side isn’t really worth going to since it’s not very pretty and has a lot of homeless camps). We of course went to Matsumoto’s World Famous Shave Ice in North Shore. We snorkeled in Hanauma Bay- one of the best snorkel sites on the island, also a preservation. We snorkeled with sea turtles on a snorkel and sail trip in Waikiki. Amazing! I almost swam into a 3 ½ foot turtle floating on the surface that I thought was an overweight man drifting. Of course that was the day my waterproof camera broke. Just before we saw the turtles. Hmph.

We did a sunset (booze) cruise with the same boat, the Outrigger, the next night. Highly recommend. It rained hard but cleared up in time for the sunset. And we got to observe some military guys hitting on some young Australian tourists. Pretty fascinating, especially after a few more drinks.

We took a train through the Dole Pineapple Plantation. Yup, that Dole. We also did the “World’s Largest Maze” at the Dole Plantation. It’s a huge maze made up of tall bushes. You have to get all the way through but you also have to find stations that are set up throughout the maze that have stencils in them so you can stencil the design onto your score card.

The record to get all designs and get out is 12 minutes. We were in there an hour and a half. At high noon. Whew!

Saturday we visited Pearl Harbor. I didn’t take a ton of picture there and it honestly had me pretty emotional. I hope that’s the last trip I make there though it was really beautiful.

I had an amazing time with my sister and niece. We called it Camp Aloha- girls only. Even my dog is a girl. It was a blast and it was so nice to have my family come out and support me here- plus it gave me a reason to get the house looking pretty.

Back to the beach.

I am a worrier at heart. I take after my mom who STILL mentions every time I talk to her to “Watch your drinking! You know it’s not good for you.” Even though I constantly tell her my sorority days are over and I literally have a glass or two of red wine with dinner every other night or so. So actually, Mom- red wine IS good for you in moderation which I swear I do! Sigh.

Anyway I stress about little things. Missing Nick. Having my boss leave. Work. Etc.

I’ve been trying to make beach trips during the week after work. It’s the perfect time since it’s not too hot about 3 or 3:30 and I can stay for a few hours and relax.

Today I had to go in early for a conference call so I got out at 1pm and got to the beach by 2:30. While I was there I read (Eat Pray Love- so addictive!), and napped, and relaxed. It got me thinking.

What is it that I love about the beach so much? It’s not the water so much. Honestly I have a horrible fear of drowning and of not knowing what’s below me if I can’t see bottom. As clear as the water is here, the lagoon I was at today still gets really deep and I can’t see the bottom and get a teeeeeeeny bit freaked that a shark or something might come up under me (we actually saw one when we were at Pearl Harbor- cliché with it’s fin sticking up out of the water and all) but I relaxed in knowing there were snorkelers closer to the entrance of a lagoon so the shark would go after them first. Morbid I know. I probably could have said they would have seen a shark before it got to me. Ah well.

I didn’t grow up at the beach. I lived in Baltimore a lot of my life and the closest beach is good ol’ Ocean City, Maryland, which is roughly a 3 hour (or less if you decide you like getting speeding tickets) drive from Baltimore.

As I lay there today thinking I finally realized when it was that I grew to love the beach so much.

When I was 21 I lived in Ocean City for the summer with an old flame (which didn’t burn very brightly). I worked a lot and worked some long hours while I was there. But every week the two of us would have a day or two off. Amidst our fighting, I would seek solace at the beach. 

Even if it was only for a few hours I would be content to be at the beach by myself because he didn’t like to go. That was my time of peace and reflection. It was my calm in the middle of a storm of a relationship. I could just sit and meditate on the waves and soak in the glorious sun.

The summer after we finally broke up, I waitressed and had lenient hours. I drove the 3 hours to the beach almost every weekend for weeks. Literally. I racked up so many miles on my car that summer.

Even if it was just for the day (which it usually was) I would drive the three hours there just to spend some time relaxing, drifting off into that uber-relaxed stage where you’re not entirely sure you’re asleep but don’t remember being awake as I listened to the waves. To me it was worth it. (The tan didn’t look too bad either though I’m much more careful about my sunblock usage now.)

As I was at the beach today I was reminded of that. I will never be an amazing swimmer and unfortunately not a mermaid (my six year old self just cried out, “NOOOO!”) but at the beach I can just close my eyes and just be. I don’t need to try to be someone I’m not. I don’t need to impress anyone. I don’t need to talk to anyone. I can just listen to the waves and relax and just breathe and drift off…

On the drive home today I was in a state of bliss. I always seem to accidentally time my leaving the beach (which is only about 15-20 minutes away from my house) so that I’m driving back home at sunset. All around me are the trademark Hawaiian clouds- low and wispy in the sky. Colors of powder purple and dusty pink that make me think of the smoothest, silkiest twirl of cotton candy. 

The sun setting pinkish orange across the mountains in my side view mirrors, and oldies playing on the radio (somehow it just seems perfect to listen to them at these moments).

I’m amazingly fortunate to be living in paradise and to be so close to something that comforts me so much when I’m by myself and don’t have a best friend close enough to talk to. I just know that time will continue to go by but hopefully more quickly now that I’m already at over the 100 day mark. Hopefully before I know it Nick will be home and we’ll be able to see this island- and all the other ones close by!- really soon.

Until then, I have my beach and I have my bliss. So I’m okay.

“You were given life; It is your duty (and also your entitlement as a human being) to find something beautiful within life, no matter how slight.” 
-Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat Pray Love

I recently started working for a non-profit organization in Honolulu and I really love it. I love feeling like I'm helping a greater good. But when I heard about the Walk coming up next weekend for a different organization I really wanted to walk in it.

Autism effects so many children- according to the CDC it effects 1 in every 80 to 1 in every 240 children. Personally I can’t even begin to imagine what it must be like to find out your child has autism, and to know that life could be drastically different for them and for you for the rest of your lives. I believe in supporting anything that can be done to help research and hopefully find a cure.
Even though I'm getting a late start with the Walk (it's next Saturday, June 12th) I set a goal of $200 and I'm really hoping to make it.

If anyone can help, I would appreciate it. You can donate directly online (tax deductible!) or you can mail in a check and it even lets you download a form to do so. ANY amount would help it. I appreciate your time and support so much!

Donate here (or sign up to walk with me!):
http://www.walknowforautismspeaks.org/hawaii/smiller

Mahalo nui loa! (Thank you very much!)

So I have to warn you that I'm feeling a teeny bit artsy fartsy right now. And a bit inspired....
 

The thing I love most about moving around is that every time we move somewhere new I feel like I'm given a new start. I love that I'm going somewhere people don't know me...It gives me a chance to analyze myself and play around with reinvention.

Girls, you know how amazing you feel when you get a new haircut or hairstyle. Picture that on a grander level. I'm not talking dying your hair that opposite color and suddenly going from pop and country music to goth...unless that's your thing.

You should never change the fundamentals and essence of who you are as an individual. But starting over in a new place allows you to take some time and analyze who you are. Is there something you want to be better at? Maybe you want to try to be friendlier to people and come off as a more social person on a first impression. Moving allows you to do that.

That's definitely one of my goals. I wish I was the person who said "Hi" first. I don't feel like I do that enough. Not because I'm not a friendly person...I just don't say hi first. Maybe it's an insecurity- that small part in my head that worries the person will just ignore me. But I can work on it.

Something I do think I'm good at is I try to make someone smile at least once a day. I love being complimented. Who doesn't? A lot of times I'll think something in my head about how nice someone's outfit looks or something. I try to get myself into the habit of saying it out loud to that person instead of leaning toward that catty, jealous side we girls can occasionally have.

Of course reinventing yourself can also just be about the fun stuff. Maybe I'll get ultra short bangs. Or try a new hair shade. Or find a new makeup trick to make a statement with. Or go vintage clothing store shopping more and fancy department store shopping less. Or bike ride more. :)

I have already made a pretty big change diet wise. For the first time in my life I'm trying to be a pescatarian- no meat- just fish and seafood. I just thought it would be an interesting change. Red meat isn't great for you and I know my body doesn't handle it well. And I really like pigs. :) So I'm giving it up for a while to see how it goes. I've also been drinking more water. And haven't been eating dairy. I don't know if I'll go forever without dairy- I love my pizza. But a few weeks at a time at least is good. I know my skin is loving it.

I'm seriously not trying to preach. Especially not about dieting and stuff. I'm just pointing out how fun it can be to reinvent. To make it a point to look at life differently- or just try something different out for a little while to see how it affects you...and maybe the people around you too. :)

Okay. Done with my inspired ranting.

Now why do I suddenly feel like breaking out a very old Fiona Apple album....?